One Year Anniversary!

Apparently I was so wrapped up in my own 24 year anniversary and my solid bar golf performance that I forgot it is Classic Irvingry's first anniversary (4/14). I am an idiot for starting a blog the day before my own birthday... its like people who get married on Valentine's Day.

So this is a pretty big deal, how fitting that I have nothing to talk about. Um, um.... no big birthday plans really, I get bashful when I am the center of attention (ha, yeah). Maybe we will push the celebrating on to the 100th post or something... chances are that will be an underwhelming social scene recap which mentions my affinity for a good fist pump and a vodka soda. Also, I probably won't have any new friends by then so it will be rather uneventful.

So I ask the readership on this holy day to provide the fodder for this post. If you would be so kind as to leave your personal highlight/favorite from a year's worth of self-important and quasi-introspective blogging I would be most appreciative.

L'chai-im!

Big 2-4.

Tell me you love me.

I am Angel Cabrera (kind of)

In honor of The Master's yesterday, I thought it about time that I provide the play by play for the crowning glory that was Bar Golf.  Oh what a day.  It was a lovely and well organized event, fun for the whole (over 21) family.  I'll spare all of the sordid details and my attempts at well written social scene recaps and return to the bulleted highlight reel form:

1. Me, hole three, It's Confidential (apparently now called "The Backstretch"... pssst, someone should tell them that they aren't anywhere near the backstretch, and that there is already a bar there)... anyway, me, pumping dollars into the juke to jam to Patty Smyth's The Warrior not once but twice (see earlier post re: the warrior)... also jammed to PYT and added Disturbia for the "dance off" (read on)

2.  My married friends killed it in the dance off, blowing away the competition (colin) with there well choreographed moves.  I, as usual, fist pumped... and asked Shan's bosses husband to catch me, Dirty Dancing style, but he couldn't be troubled.

3. Colin getting cocky during said dance off and doing the worm (success) and using his arm and foot as a jump rope one time (success) and then another time (fail), where he tripped himself and ate hardwood.  Better luck next time.

4. Peabody's was also a highlight where I won a hat from 2004 for having the closest birthday.  Note: Colin orchestrated this award and roughly 40 minutes later said something about my birthday and could not remember the date... he also came up to us at Peabody's (hole 2) and proudly proclaimed "I'm blacked out."

5. Sassmaster and I taking a detour to drop off prizes in the offices of a certain downtown fun-center.  Speaking of, I better get my Corona ice bucket, Harlem globetrotters basketball, and 2004 Bar Golf hat back soon.

6. 9 Maple was basically the point of no return.  This bar gave us such great highlights as: "I am going to F S U!!!! .... you know, fuck shit up"  That right there is classic mcneillery.

7. Gaffneys bore witness to the great tattoo off, which Aek was ROBBED of!  I hope my aunt isn't reading this, as she is yet to learn of Aek's 4 year old tattoo.

8. Girl yacking outside of Bullpen... as one of the organizers later said to me: "thank god they signed waivers"

9. The post tournament dance party at TnL.

10.  The number of times someone (probably Jen) said to me, "my god, its still light out!"

11. Now, there is no justice that can be done to Sassmaster's FIVE (5) voicemails he left me in the span of ONE (1) hour... they are the FUNNIEST things I have ever heard.  I am in the process of transcribing them.  Next time the group is together I will hook up some speakers and play them for a crowd... I will say, however, that the voicemails can be broken down into a few key themes which were touched on throughout:

a. I (me) am a loser and Sassmaster is a winner.

b. "game over"

c. Jimmy P. jokes

d. me having the "Zactly Disease" (look it up)

12. Someone also broke their ankle, right?

13. Last but not least, I WON BEST FEMALE FINISHER... TOP SCORE FOR THE WOMEN!  I have a huge trophy.  I was unable to give a speech, but I was able to use my trophy as a microphone and an air guitar during my victory jam sesh.  Basically, I struck the perfect balance between drinking a decent amount AND still having the cognitive skills to turn my scorecard in at hole #9.  Also, buttery nipple shots really padded my score.  As well as a strategically-eaten pre-tee off chicken tender.  No worries, I plan on writing up a full strategy sheet for next year... it'll be available for purchase as the 2010 date nears.

So yeah that's it... day was awesome, I was awesome... good time had by all.   I know you ALL have something to say re: this post, so PLEASE add it in comments.  Now, I need to go pick up my green jacket from the cleaners.... get it??

Cachinnation

Recently I have taken in two wildly hilarious speakers. True to form, I will attempt to recap their genius, fall unbelievably short of that, and leave everyone thinking 'hmm, she really is better off not re-telling anything or making recommendations.'

First off, Sunday night welcomed the second comedy special of Jim Gaffigan. In 2007 I was introduced to "Beyond the Pale" which brought me some of my favorite and oft-used comedic one-liners ('I dated an Asian girl.. she was really Asian. She was a panda.') In his new special "King Baby" Gaffigan balances the right amount of weird inside-his-head-voice with general life observations that I found quite entertaining. Either recalling his own take on various food or re-telling of one of his own, laughable contretemps, Gaffigan delivers in his signature slow, steady manner.

The second, and, dare I say, more worldly of the two was Mr. David Sedaris himself. I caught the simulcast of his talk/reading at the College last night with AJS and it was so amazing. I definitely cannot do any of it justice... I highly recommend subscribing to the This American Life podcast and waiting patiently until you catch a Sedaris-read tale.

Sedaris had the ability, in my opinion, to mold a certain amount of propinquity with his audience. I felt as if we had met before (even though we have not and I was watching him on a giant screen). I guess that is the talent of a gifted writer and speaker. He read from his own diary that he keeps, which was very funny and probably one of my favorite parts. It gave me a little glimmer of hope for my own paltry essays and obersvations I keep on my computer; although Sedaris' mind, wit, and propensity for poignant takes on the everyday is certainly no match for myself, or even for Classic Irvingry. All in all, a nice few days of laughter.

Cut to Sedaris, rolling over wherever he is because I just lumped him a blog post with a stand up comic.

And yes, holy vocabulary words, Batman!

Howe'd They Do That?

The next rainy day we have we are taking a trip to Howe Caverns. Requisite pause for Shan to have a giddy-fit, as this place is her mecca. I have NO IDEA why.

http://www.howecaverns.com/


Similarly, I have had the pleasure of rediscovering the Planet Earth miniseries this week. Why I ever stopped watching this is beyond me. Basically I could watch this on a loop for days on end... it truly fascinates me. Even better, I have set my tv sleep timer and fallen asleep to it a few nights in a row and let me tell you there is nothing like being lulled to sleep by one Ms. Sigournye Weaver herself (that is spelled wrong).

So at last the weekend is (nearly) upon us. A belated birthday wish to the sassmaster (I hope big JI can qualify to be one of his clients). Tomorrow will be celebratory downtowness of some sort I am sure... also, as Mrs. Sassmaster informed me, it is ALMOST flip flop weather... but not if you are going to Howe Caverns, that is a sneakers-mandatory operation.

LET'S GO CUSE.... ELITE 8!!!

The Lord is My Shepherd?

Okay so I was in the midst of brainstorming for a fabulous Monday AM blup, and I think that is still coming, but in the meantime I had to share the following video which was forwarded to me at work. Seriously, this is so funny and amazing. These dogs are a lot smarter than my two (which, by the way learned their first command this week: "sit.") Well, technically only Jack learned it as Gus is being kind of a bastard about the whole thing. Anyway, without further ado... I give you, talented border collies and their soon-to-be-socks friends:

UConn is Dumb

Calhoun doesn't coach because he is dehydrated... seriously, you are the ONLY person not actually playing any basketball at all.  It would be more feasible that the 16th man got dehydrated during layup lines.   God I hate UConn.